This Book Is Full of Spiders

This Book Is Full of Spiders Author David Wong
ISBN-10 9781250017901
Year 2012-10-02
Pages 416
Language en
Publisher Macmillan
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From the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes. WARNING: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR. You will dismiss this as ridiculous fear-mongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fear-mongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection -- the creature secretes a chemical into the brain to stimulate skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That's just as well, since the "cure" involves learning what a chainsaw tastes like. You can't feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings. You can't see it, because it decides what you see. You won't even feel it when it breeds. And it will breed. So what happens when your family, friends and neighbors get mind-controlling skull spiders? We're all about to find out. Just stay calm, and remember that telling you about the spider situation is not the same as having caused it. I'm just the messenger. Even if I did sort of cause it. Either way, I won't hold it against you if you're upset. I know that's just the spider talking.

This Book Is Full Of Spiders Seriously Dude Don t Touch It

This Book Is Full Of Spiders  Seriously Dude Don t Touch It Author David Wong
ISBN-10 9781781164563
Year 2012-10-02
Pages 496
Language en
Publisher Titan Books
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Fan favourite David Wong takes readers to a whole new level with this blistering sequel to the cult sensation John Dies at the End, now a movie starring Paul Giamatti. As the sequel opens, we find our heroes, David and John, again embroiled in a series of horrifying yet mind-bogglingly ridiculous events caused primarily by their own gross incompetence. The guys find that books and movies about zombies may have triggered a zombie apocalypse, despite a complete lack of zombies in the world. As they race against the clock to protect humanity from its own paranoia, they must ask themselves, who are the real monsters? Actually, that would be the shape-shifting horrors secretly taking over the world behind the scenes that, in the end, make John and Dave kind of wish it had been zombies after all. Hilarious, terrifying, engaging and wrenching, This Book Is Full of Spiders, the next thrilling installment, takes us for a wild ride with two slackers from the midwest who really have better things to do with their time than prevent the apocalypse.

This Book Is Full of Spiders

This Book Is Full of Spiders Author David Wong
ISBN-10 9780312546342
Year 2012-10-02
Pages 406
Language en
Publisher Macmillan
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David and John become embroiled in a new set of horrific but absurd challenges when movie-induced zombie phobia enables a nefarious shape-shifter race to take over the world.

John Dies at the End

John Dies at the End Author David Wong
ISBN-10 9780857686220
Year 2011-09-08
Pages 480
Language en
Publisher Titan Books
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My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrock, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defence is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part about the bratwurst. Why? You'll just have to trust me. Unfortunately for us, if you make the right choice, we'll have a much harder time explaining how to fight off the otherwordly invasion currently threatening to enslave humanity. I'm sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: NONE OF THIS IS MY FAULT...

What the Hell Did I Just Read

What the Hell Did I Just Read Author David Wong
ISBN-10 9781250040206
Year 2017-10-03
Pages 384
Language en
Publisher John Dies at the End
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It's the story "They" don't want you to read. Though, to be fair, "They" are probably right about this one. To quote the Bible, "Learning the truth can be like loosening a necktie, only to realize it was the only thing keeping your head attached." No, don't put the book back on the shelf -- it is now your duty to purchase it to prevent others from reading it. Yes, it works with e-books, too, I don't have time to explain how. While investigating a fairly straightforward case of a shape-shifting interdimensional child predator, Dave, John and Amy realized there might actually be something weird going on. Together, they navigate a diabolically convoluted maze of illusions, lies, and their own incompetence in an attempt to uncover a terrible truth they -- like you -- would be better off not knowing. Your first impulse will be to think that a story this gruesome -- and, to be frank, stupid -- cannot possibly be true. That is precisely the reaction "They" are hoping for. John Dies at the End's "smart take on fear manages to tap into readers' existential dread on one page, then have them laughing the next" (Publishers Weekly) and This Book is Full of Spiders was "unlike any other book of the genre" (Washington Post). Now, New York Times bestselling author David Wong is back with What the Hell Did I Just Read, the third installment of this black-humored thriller series.

Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits

Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits Author David Wong
ISBN-10 9781783291854
Year 2015-10-06
Pages 496
Language en
Publisher Titan Books
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In a prosperous yet gruesomely violent near-future, superhero vigilantes battle thugs whose heads are full of supervillain fantasies. The peace is kept by a team of smooth, well-dressed negotiators called The Men in Fancy Suits. College grad Zoey discovers her scumbag dad was one of the founding members of the Fancy Suits, and quickly becomes entangled in the city's surreal mob war when she is taken hostage by a particularly crazy villain.

Mogworld

Mogworld Author Yahtzee Croshaw
ISBN-10 9781621151593
Year 2008-04-22
Pages 350
Language en
Publisher Dark Horse Comics
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In a world full to bursting with would-be heroes, Jim couldn't be less interested in saving the day. His fireballs fizzle. He's awfully grumpy. Plus, he's been dead for about sixty years. When a renegade necromancer wrenches him from eternal slumber and into a world gone terribly, bizarrely wrong, all Jim wants is to find a way to die properly, once and for all. On his side, he's got a few shambling corpses, an inept thief, and a powerful death wish. But he's up against tough odds: angry mobs of adventurers, a body falling apart at the seams — and a team of programmers racing a deadline to hammer out the last few bugs in their AI. *Mogworld is the debut novel from video-game icon Yahtzee Croshaw (Zero Punctuation)! With an exclusive one-chapter preview of Yahtzee Croshaw's next novel, Jam—coming to bookstores in October 2012! *Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw's video review site, Zero Punctuation, receives over 2,500,000 unique hits a month, and has been licensed by G4 Television. *Yahtzee's blog receives about 150,000 hits per day. "The first legitimate breakout hit from the gaming community in recent memory." -Boing Boing

Jam

Jam Author Yahtzee Croshaw
ISBN-10 9781621154433
Year 2012-10-23
Pages 160
Language en
Publisher Dark Horse Comics
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We were prepared for an earthquake. We had a flood plan in place. We could even have dealt with zombies. Probably. But no one expected the end to be quite so... sticky... or strawberry scented. Yahtzee Croshaw (Mogworld, Zero Punctuation Reviews) returns to print with a follow-up to his smash-hit debut: Jam, a dark comedy about the one apocalypse no one predicted. * The hilarious new novel by the author of Mogworld! * Croshaw's Zero Punctuation Reviews is the most viewed video game review on the web! * For lovers of bizarre horror and unforgettable characters! "[Croshaw is] able to pull off slapstick comedy in print, and that's no easy feat." –ComicsAlliance

Zombology

Zombology Author Brian Anse Patrick
ISBN-10 9781907166914
Year 2014-05-28
Pages 182
Language en
Publisher Arktos
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In films, television, books, games, pornography, and now even in firearms and ammunition being sold to the American public, zombies are one of the mainstays of the popular culture of our time. Far from being only a passing curiosity, Brian Patrick dissects the zombie, showing it as the articulation of deep-seated fears within the Western psyche, a symbol in fact for the growing dehumanization that many of us observe, or perhaps sense without fully realizing it, in modern civilization. Patrick connects the zombie phenomenon to previous historical occurrences, drawing on both religion and psychology to show how such symbolic tropes that lodge in the collective unconscious of a culture are reflective of the psychological needs of large numbers of people in times of crisis. Patrick likewise shows how zombiedom has manifested particularly in American gun culture, and how this relates to the growth of a large-scale citizens' activist movement in favor of gun rights. Also included are practical tips on how to stay out of the clutches of zombiedom. Zombology is more than just a book about zombies, however. The zombie, for Patrick, is a peculiarly Western phenomenon, and as such, he examines how it can be seen as a manifestation of not-so-abstract forces battling for the future of our civilization: will collectivization or the individual, dream or reality win out? Patrick offers his own diagnosis. "At the very least the zombie adds some much-needed psychic contrast to the cold, to the grey and to the unending. It also provides a face, albeit necrotic, to the seemingly impersonal sociological forces that undermine the West; for in a near-perfect correspondence with the zombie, the West itself appears to be necrotic in a galloping way. Both need brains to ease the pain."-p. 48

Will Save the Galaxy for Food

Will Save the Galaxy for Food Author Yahtzee Croshaw
ISBN-10 9781506701653
Year 2017-02-14
Pages 232
Language en
Publisher Dark Horse Comics
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A not-quite epic science fiction adventure about a down-on-his luck galactic pilot caught in a cross-galaxy struggle for survival! Space travel just isn't what it used to be. With the invention of Quantum Teleportation, space heroes aren't needed anymore. When one particularly unlucky ex-adventurer masquerades as famous pilot and hate figure Jacques McKeown, he's sucked into an ever-deepening corporate and political intrigue. Between space pirates, adorable deadly creatures, and a missing fortune in royalties, saving the universe was never this difficult! From the creator of Mogworld and Jam! Benjamin Richard "Yahtzee" Croshaw is a British-Australian comedic writer, video game journalist, author, and video game developer. He is perhaps best known for his acerbic video game review series, Zero Punctuation, for The Escapist.

How to Fight Presidents

How to Fight Presidents Author Daniel O'Brien
ISBN-10 9780385347587
Year 2014-03-18
Pages 272
Language en
Publisher Three Rivers Press
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Make no mistake: Our founding fathers were more bandanas-and-muscles than powdered-wigs-and-tea. As a prisoner of war, Andrew Jackson walked several miles barefoot across state lines while suffering from smallpox and a serious head wound received when he refused to polish the boots of the soldiers who had taken him captive. He was thirteen years old. A few decades later, he became the first popularly elected president and served the nation, pausing briefly only to beat a would-be assassin with a cane to within an inch of his life. Theodore Roosevelt had asthma, was blind in one eye, survived multiple gunshot wounds, had only one regret (that there were no wars to fight under his presidency), and was the first U.S. president to win the Medal of Honor, which he did after he died. Faced with the choice, George Washington actually preferred the sound of bullets whizzing by his head in battle over the sound of silence. And now these men—these hallowed leaders of the free world—want to kick your ass. Plenty of historians can tell you which president had the most effective economic strategies, and which president helped shape our current political parties, but can any of them tell you what to do if you encounter Chester A. Arthur in a bare-knuckled boxing fight? This book will teach you how to be better, stronger, faster, and more deadly than the most powerful (and craziest) men in history. You’re welcome.

The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe

The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe Author Joseph Fink
ISBN-10 9780062468659
Year 2016-09-06
Pages 320
Language en
Publisher HarperCollins
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From the authors of the New York Times bestselling novel Welcome to Night Vale and the creators of the #1 international podcast of the same name, comes a collection of episodes from Season Two of their hit podcast, featuring a foreword by the authors, behind-the-scenes commentary, and original illustrations. In June of 2012, the creators of Welcome to Night Vale began airing twice-weekly podcasts, hoping to be heard by anyone outside their close circles. By the anniversary show a year later, the fanbase had exploded, vaulting the podcast into the #1 spot on iTunes. Since then, its popularity has grown by epic proportions, hitting more than 100 million downloads, and Night Vale has expanded to a successful live multi-cast international touring stage show and a New York Times bestselling novel. Now the first two seasons are available as books, offering an entertaining reading experience and a valuable reference guide to past episodes. In The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe we witness a totalitarian takeover of Night Vale that threatens to forever change the town and everyone living in it. The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe features a foreword by co-writer Jeffrey Cranor, behind-the-scenes commentary and guest introductions by performers from the podcast and notable fans, including Cecil Baldwin (Cecil), Mara Wilson (The Faceless Old Woman), Hal Lublin (Steve Carlsberg) among others. Also included is the full script from the Welcome to Night Vale live show, The Debate. Beautiful illustrations by series artist Jessica Hayworth accompany each episode. The Great Glowing Coils of the Universe is an absolute must-have whether you’re a fan of the podcast or discovering for the first time the wonderful world of Night Vale.

License to Quill

License to Quill Author Jacopo della Quercia
ISBN-10 9781466865037
Year 2015-12-15
Pages 320
Language en
Publisher St. Martin's Griffin
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License to Quill is a page-turning James Bond-esque spy thriller starring William Shakespeare and Christopher Marlowe during history's real life Gunpowder Plot. The story follows the fascinating golden age of English espionage, the tumultuous cold war gripping post-Reformation Europe, the cloak-and-dagger politics of Shakespeare's England, and lastly, the mysterious origins of the Bard's most haunting play: Macbeth. You won't want to miss this fast-paced historical retelling!

The Realm of Possibility

The Realm of Possibility Author David Levithan
ISBN-10 0307490033
Year 2008-12-30
Pages 224
Language en
Publisher Knopf Books for Young Readers
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This collection of linked poems from David Levithan, the author of the New York Times bestseller Every Day and the groundbreaking classic Boy Meets Boy and the co-author of Will Grayson, Will Grayson (with John Green), will introduce you to a world of unforgettable and emotionally resonant voices. Here’s what I know about the realm of possibility— it is always expanding, it is never what you think it is. Everything around us was once deemed impossible. From the airplane overhead to the phones in our pockets to the choir girl putting her arm around the metalhead. As hard as it is for us to see sometimes, we all exist within the realm of possibility. Most of the limits are of our own world’s devising. And yet, every day we each do so many things that were once impossible to us. Enter The Realm of Possibility and meet a boy whose girlfriend is in love with Holden Caulfield; a girl who loves the boy who wears all black; a boy with the perfect body; and a girl who writes love songs for a girl she can’t have. These are just a few of the captivating characters readers will get to know in this intensely heartfelt new novel about those ever-changing moments of love and heartbreak that go hand-in-hand with high school. David Levithan plumbs the depths of teenage emotion to create an amazing array of voices that readers won’t forget. So, enter their lives and prepare to welcome the realm of possibility open to us all. Love, joy, and these stories will linger. A MARGARET A. EDWARDS AWARD WINNER AN ALA TOP TEN BEST BOOK FOR YOUNG ADULTS A NEW YORK PUBLIC LIBRARY BOOK FOR THE TEEN AGE “Luminous . . . each voice sings with hope, humor and possibility.” —Time Out New York Kids From the Hardcover edition.